Tom: I had to stay after school to deal with a bad student. Harry: A “bad student.” Wow. That’s such an extreme judgment. I don’t know that I believe in “bad students.” I believe in misguided students, underprivileged students, wild students. But “bad students”? Yikes. Tom: Do you believe in “bad teachers”? Harry: That’s different.Continue reading “Bad”
Tom: I think it’s important for people to embrace their imperfections. Harry: Even racists? Tom: Racism isn’t an imperfection. It’s evil. Harry: What sort of imperfections did you have in mind? Tom: I don’t know. Ordering too much from the Pottery Barn website. Harry: You think it’s important that people embrace the fact they orderContinue reading “Embracing Your Imperfections”
Tom: Capital punishment is stupid. You can’t prove killing is wrong by killing. Harry: How do propose kidnappers should be punished? Tom: They should be put in prison. Harry: Doesn’t putting someone in jail seem a lot like kidnapping to you? Tom: No. Why? Harry: I mean, sending someone to jail for kidnapping means you’reContinue reading “It’s Different”
Tom: Hey, wanted to ask you a question about your sign. Harry: We’re very passionate about social justice. Tom: Sure. I just wanted to know what “WATER IS LIFE” means? Harry: Huh? Tom: Your sign says you believe “WATER IS LIFE.” I don’t get it. Harry: Oh, right. Well… I have to admit, I’m notContinue reading ““Water Is Life””
Tom: Would you say you’re loyal to your wife? Harry: Of course. Absolutely. Tom: Would you say you’re loyal to your church? Harry: Uh, well, what do you mean by “loyalty”?
Students: Mr. Gibbs, do you think the church should have political power? Gibbs: Why do you ask? Students: I don’t know. Gibbs: Do you just want to hear me say something controversial? Students: Yes. Gibbs: Then I’ll do you one better. I think the church should have spiritual power.
“Camilla: My new diary arrived in the mail today. Gibbs: Before you start this diary, I’m going to lay down a few rules for how it can be kept. Camilla: What are the rules? Gibbs: First, your diary will not be a secret diary. I might pick it up and read it whenever I choose. Secret diariesContinue reading “A Conversation With My Daughter About Keeping A Diary”
Billy Corgan: The killer in me is the killer in you. Billy Corgan’s Wife: Sure, I get that. The thing is, I still need you to tie the bread bag tight or the bread gets dry and the kids won’t eat it.
“The blood of the martyrs is the seed of the church.” -Tertullian “The fun outreach program is the seed of the church.” -Modern Tertullian
My kids: So-and-so said something disrespectful about a teacher at lunch today. Gibbs: I see. What is So-and-so’s last name? And then my opinion of So-and-so’s parents changes.