If Your Son Quits Going To Church In College, You Owe Me $5000

“Gibbs: I’ve seen a lot of kids lose their faith at colleges like the one he’s trying to get into.

Parent: What is it about Allister that makes you think that will happen to him?

Gibbs: Honestly, it’s not him. It’s you. Anyone as certain as you are that things will be just fine simply doesn’t take the threat very seriously.

Parent: That’s rather curt of you, Mr. Gibbs.

Gibbs: I suppose so, but I’ve been waiving my hands around frantically for years trying to get parents to take the threat of apostasy seriously, and almost no one does.  

Parent: So you’re not going to write him a letter of recommendation?

Gibbs: No, I will. I have one condition, though.  

Parent: What’s that?

Gibbs: If Allister quits attending church in his first year of college, you have to pay me five thousand dollars.

Parent: Ha ha! Wait, you’re serious, aren’t you?”

-from So You Want A Letter Of Recommendation To A Big State School?

The 7 Best Songs Not On Spotify

“Direction,” by Interpol

“Paradise Circus,” (Burial Remix) by Massive Attack

“This Temporary Life,” by Death Cab for Cutie

“Polaroid Millennium,” by Superior

“Fools Rush In,” (Kevin Shields Remix) by Bow Wow Wow

“I’ll Try Anything Once,” (demo) by Julian Casablancas

“This,” by Brian Eno